so some bad news. auntie pat passed away last saturday. it was so sudden! it's crazy how someone that went from being happy to being diagnosed with lung cancer to passing away. it just blows my mind. but i do know that she is now in a happier place. she's in heaven with god and the angels. we will truly miss her.
another bad news...josh's dog Blade was put down today. he's 10 years old! a very long life for a dog :) he was the most amazing dog i have ever met. and many of you know that i don't like dogs cause i got bitten by a dog then attacked again by another. i have a huge phobia with them. i still do! but not with Blade. he made me feel so safe and loved. no dog EVER can compare to what we had. i loved him. it was really sad. when i visited him on wednesday he was laying down on his blankets and pillows resting. steve, josh's dad took him to fiesta island to run and swim (his favorite). he was actually having some difficulty eating that week but when josh visited him...he actually ate something:) i think Blade just wanted Josh's company. he was vomiting that morning so Josh's mom told Josh to visit Blade cause she scheduled a vet to come to their house to euthanize him. but Blade was better when Josh visited. That night when I saw him i just held him. petted him and just hugged him. that's when the tears came. non stop crying. and i just came from auntie pat's viewing...cried a lot too. so josh's mom decided to cancel the appointment and decided to have another vet see Blade today to see how his condition was. The vet said that he has an enlarged liver. this was the reason for his belly to swell. we were wondering why his tummy was so big like a balloon and he was barely eating anything. he lost soooo much weight. but it was right then and there that aida and steve decided to put him down. it will ease the pain. if they just let it be then Blade's liver could erupt causing more pain for him. today was a sad day for the smith's... and me of course. and everyone who has gotten to know him. he was an amazing dog! i know that the smiths are sad right now but they know that he is in a better place. he will truly be missed. i know that everytime i visit their place that there will always be someone missing.
R.I.P. Blade Smith
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so i really want anthony bourdain's book kitchen confidential. bourdain is awesome. he's raw, intelligent, bold, and just plain crazy. love it. i remember him back in the day on the food network. insane. eating anything and everything.
well today was kind of a bad day. well so was yesterday. i had heartburn! argh! i hate that shit. damn my esophagus. i just want to yank it out of my insides and beat the shit out it. i got woken up at 3 am because of it. couldn't go back to sleep so i had to turn on the tv. nothing interesting was on just a bunch of infomercials. but their fun to watch nontheless. finally, the pain kind of went away around 5 am. sheesh. had some more sleep which was good. but the whole day today i felt it come back. but besides the annoyance of acid reflux...sharyn and i went to josh's to use his gym. so the three of us exercised our heart out. i did the bicycle machine. i didn't want to use the elyptical machine just yet cause the heartburt will come back from the constant walking/running up and down. so i did the bike for over 20 minutes which is equivalent to 3 miles. after that i did the other bike thing but that was hard. did the stairmaster. i didnt' get how it worked for a good 30 seconds but got a hang of it for a little. it's hard. i don't like it. then josh told me to do weights. that was fun but challenging. i have no upper body strength whatsoever! that's something i want to build up on. i want toned arms. *flex* ahahah. after the work out...we went back to bubb's. he took a shower then went to subway for his dinner. went back to my house, chilled, and watched man vs. wild. and that was that.
so a few things. i ordered 4 nyx round lipsticks. their really nice colors too. so i'm waiting on that to arrive in the mail. AND there's the e.l.f. order. just some eyeshadow brushes and blotting papers. i'll post photos on how the lipsticks look.
anyway, some bad news...auntie pat passed away on saturday =) my heart goes out to her family.
tune in next time...
so today we went to the hospital to visit my cousin's aunt who is very sick. auntie pat was going to the hospital for a check up and the doctor's suddenly found something ( a lump in her larynx, i believe) and was quickly rushed into emergency. now she's in the ICU. wow. it's crazy how something like that happens. they haven't done a biopsy just yet cause she's too weak to have tests done to her. she's been loosing so much weight cause she couldn't eat/swallow her food. a part of her larynx or something was paralyzed and the lump caused her to not swallow her food. kind of like what happened to me except mine was in the esophagus. but now she's down to 80 pounds!!! 80 pounds!!! my god! seeing her in her bed with a big oxygen mask covered her entire face. she looked so little. i didn't want to say anything cause what do i say? her husband kept saying "you'll get through this! you're strong you can beat this!" so sad. i mean i wanted to cry but i held back. the same thing happened to my lolo. he couldn't talk either cause the lymph nodes spread all over his lungs and everywhere else in between. she kept pointing to her neck indicating that she couldn't speak and you can tell that she was saying "thank you" to us for coming. she actually wanted no medication or help from machines anymore. she wanted to just let it be and let god take care of the rest. but people wouldn't let her. but i guess their going to do the hospice program. it's where a nurse comes to their house and monitors her for a period of time everyday. i remember my lolo had the same. but now...all we have to do is pray for her.
it's amazing how someone is healthy one day and then in critical condition the next. last time we saw her she was stronger than her husband! now she's in the 4th stage cancer!!! well it's not finalized that she was cancer but she's in the 4th stage! =( it's just sad. this whole thing just brings back memories of how my grandfather was. it was the saddest moment of my life. and now it's like happening all over again. all we can do now is pray pray pray.
so to auntie pat, apostol family, acayan family...you're in my prayers!
so i guess some "people" are complaining how i don't update this thing. hahahaha. i.e. sharyn! so anyway, i guess i haven't been updating cause either i'm lazy or there's really nothing interesting that happened to me. i'll try my best to remember what "happened" to me last week including parts of this week =)
well last week josh got sick. so i hung around with him in his apartment. i mostly just watched bravo tv since i don't have that channel at my house. i love top chef! josh was hooked on it too but he won't admit it. what else? we watched movies too like max paine and bangkok dangerous. they were okay movies. but whatevs.
last weekend...didn't do much. did the sam i guess. hung out with bubbs and watched tv/movies.
so this week....monday didn't do anything. just hung around. yesterday i took ate monet downtown cause she had some stuff do. then when we got back i made breakfast =) pancakes, sausages, and eggs. yummmmm!!! then sharyn and i decided to go to the mall to look for this makeup brand NYX. but first we went to carlsbad outlet to check out the cosmetics company outlet. pretty cool place. they have discounted makeups like MAC, bobbi brown, clinique, etc. they have a good amount of selection. price is good too. so that was that. after the outlet we went to the mall. checked out the makeup sharyn wanted and it was there. and they had a great selection of colors which was awesome. so now we know where to get them =) after that we went home but as we were pulling inside the garage my dad told us to go to auntie tessie's cause she made some loglog. so we hurriedly went there cause loglog is yummy=) it was kuya glenn's birthday yesterday so that's why she made a bunch of food. hung around there for awhile. hung out with kayla and karina and ronell of course=) i didn't get to eat that much cause it was also josh's birthday yesterday. so around 4 i left. got ready. i put on my fake lashes yesterday. i did a good job on it. sometimes i get annoyed cause i can't seem to put it on right. so i just get frustrated and it don't even bother with it. anyway, josh and his family and i went to hunter's steakhouse. it was yummy. i had the petite prime rib with beer battered shrimp special. oh but first, i had clam chowder soup as one of the sides. delicioso!!! but anyway...it was sooo good. the chocolate/brownie cake was also good. josh's birthday cake they gave. hahahha. ate that. stephanie's (josh's sister) mud pie was oh so good too. actually better than the cake. but chocolate is always good. i was so full last night. my goodness. i thought i was going to vomit cause i was so full. by the way...happy birthday again hun!!! yay! we're the same age...for now. in march i'll be 25! shit! a quarter of a century. that's so scary. what's scary is that i don't have a job yet! it's so fucking frustrating. i have bills to pay and yet no job. but on a happier note...sharyn got a job! woohoo. i'm so happy for her. she deserves it. all her hardwork at school needed to pay of and now it just did. she deserves everything good in this world. i mean that from the bottom of my heart. she's the one person i look up to the most. if i had the drive, motivation, intelligence like her then man i think i'd have a job too. wow i really don't want to get into this. cause it would take forever AND it would kind of get emotional cause i'd have to rant about the things that are swirling around my head. i'll do that in the next post.
oh a quick shout out before i go... hi sanchia! sharyn told me that you read my blog =) and course my sister! hey there. hi there. ho there. =) ahahahahha. you happy now?!
tune in next time...
hahaha. hi readers! it's been awhile. been kinda "busy." my weekend was alright. just hung out with the family and the boyfriend. nothing exciting. by the way, i still haven't figured out that picture thing i was talking about in my last blog. ehh. i'll get around to it eventually.
as far as jobs go, i'm still waiting for a call back. hopefully this week someone will call me =) i'll still keep a look out on craigslist, yahoo jobs, etc.
gosh...i don't think i have much to say today. so i guess i'll leave it here. i'm sorry i'm so boring today. i guess there's nothing massively important lately.
tune in next time...
i'm getting frustrated with this picture postings thing here. picasa is kinda wack. i don't get it. when i go to my cousin's baby's blogspot, the albums and pictures are organized. i don't know how to do it. frankly, i'm at a point where i don't care anymore. if i don't figure it out, i might not post photo albums here. i think there's something wrong with me. oy vey!
anyway, let me tell you all about this book i'm reading. i got it at barnes and noble. it i called MYTHOLOGY The ILLUSTRATED ANTHOLOGY of WORLD MYTH & STORYTELLING. Amazing! seriously, not many of you guys know this unknown fact about me but i love this stuff! ever since i was a kid i loved watching national geographic and the history channel about greek mythology AND especially egyptians. mummies, tombs, mythological creatures, gods & goddess, etc. i love it! this book is so awesome. and it only cost me $10!!! it's over 670 pages of awesomeness. ahahaha. i skipped the first chapters of it so i can go straight to greek mythology. hahahaha. seriously, i don't know why i didn't major in this stuff. makes me want to go back to school and take a bunch of anthropology and art history courses. i'm almost done with greek mythology and on my way through celtics, vikings, and germanic worlds. hahah. i might skip this and go into egypt. truthfully, i don't care much about indian mythology but ehh who knows, i might end up liking it. so yeah, that's what i do in bed. i read this 20 pound book and fall asleep. hahaha. sharyn actually caught me a few times asleep while the book is wide open and my glasses still on.
speaking of books...josh got me j.k. rowling's new book beedle the bard. read that in an hour. hahah. it's a small book but good nontheless. i still have to read the rest of jane austen's books. josh got me the jane austen collection last christmas and have not read it. well i've read like two of austen's books so far so i just have to read a few. as far as harry potter goes. i believe the only books i have not read are the first two. i bought them years ago but have not. i started reading the 3rd book first on to the last book. i know horrible. i'll get to the first two eventually. there's so many books i want to read...i can't keep up. i love books. i love using my imagination. i especially love it when i read a book by an english author because i read them as if i have a british accent. hahaha. it's really fun. i sometimes catch myself talking with an accent. hahaha. crazy me. oh yeah, sharyn's reading 1984 right now. ronell lent me that book. i'm ashamed to say that i did not finish what i started. hopefully, when sharyn's done...i can find my place.
well i think that's enough of my rants!
tune in next time...
today was somewhat productive. sharyn i went to utc mall then to best buy. we got a fitness video and the killers cd. i also applied at macy's. hahaha. i need a job. really bad. but for now i guess we'll do the workout video and hopefully there will be results. hahaha.
but about this macy's thing...i really need any job right now. i did work at it's a grind for a good 5 days but eh not my thing. retail is cool. it's something i've never done before. hopefully i get a call back. i'll apply at some other places too like this girls clothing store called Justice. it used to be Limited Too but i guess something happened. looks like an okay place. forever21 was hiring too but no thanks. i heard it was a pretty wack place to work cause my friend rachel worked there. AND it's owned/managed by asian people. i vow to never work for someone who owns a store by an asian woman. their really hard asses and crazy! hahaha. i'd apply at nordstrom but they can be snooty since you know "rich" people shop there. but eh we'll see.
hustlin' aint easy! Hahaha! just kidding. it's funny saying that. i'll find a job soon. something's out there for me. it may not be what i want (for now) but it's something.
tune in next time...
